Corners

Happiness is just around the corner, they said. They kept saying it over and over again. But I don't know how far the corner is from where I am standing. It could be miles and miles away, or worse it could just be a straight path onwards, without any corners. What if? What if there is no corner for me? I am scared. And I'm tired of being scared. I'm tired of looking for corners, for it seems as they never come. And if they do, they are but a fleeting shadow of a corner; gone so quick, it seems neglible in the fast flow.

It seems that my life is built around looking for corners, and the straight path up ahead holds no promise for me whatsoever. It daunts me, making me want to run away. It is only a long strech of road, barren and hopeless. The corner should appear out of nowhere, for it does not seem to be visible. Being brave in the face of adversity seems like a joke; an impossible feat almost. I never knew how to be brave, and I probably shall not be starting anytime soon.

It makes me sit, right on the middle of this beaten up road, not wanting to take another step forward or backward; being still, stock still. All the enthusiasm seems to have gone out, and it seems I am forever fighting battles with my demons and myself. I have had enough. I am tired. I am stumbling now, swaying with exhaustion. And I'm afraid, for if I fall, I will fall so hard that no one will be able to save me. So all I ask is, where is my corner? Where is it?